The next chapter

I started this blog when I came back in May, really as a form of therapy to ease me back into the real world and into Scotland. And now, finally, I think I'm out the other side. I only realised this a few weeks ago: I wasn't hankering after what had been and instead was much more focused on what next, where I want to get involved and make a difference. I'm a whole lot clearer on that one now.

Edinburgh is shaping up nicely. John, Pippa and Fiona are looking after me in different ways and I'm meeting some good people. My Glasgow friends are helping me out too. And it is great to see my brother, Paula and Beinn more often. Duke of Edinburgh is proving challenging but fun - how do you keep a room of fifty 14 year olds occupied for an hour? I've found a great group who are interested in spiritual philosophy and meditation and I'm loving all of that, people with whom to talk about the meaning of life! And I love the size of the place, you can cycle everywhere in 20 minutes.

The only real fly in the ointment is work. Finding interesting roles is a challenge. I think this is partly down to the economic situation, partly lack of clarity on my part, and of course the fact there just aren't the same range of opportunities here. And I'm trying to make a bit of shift without a real network to connect me to the possibilities.

Add to this recent contact with my old boss who may have an opportunity for me and I'm feeling quite torn. Is it back to London for now? Exploring the options will help me decide. If it is, it won't be back to old life, I'm confident of that. But I'm not ready to slip into my pipe and slippers quite yet and I mustn't commit myself to something in that environment, I'll be going mad in 6 months. I need to get into a decent role again, I feel I'm stagnating and it is bloody boring. Not to mention the money situtation which is worse than awful.

Whatever decision, I'm there. I've been and seen and am out the other side and feel it is time for this blog to come to an end. Once I find an interesting topic on which to write, I'll start another. Time for the next chapter; thanks for tuning in.

FANTASTIC

I've been watching the youtube Obama video that Tamsin posted this morning. It is indeed inspirational. What's interesting though is the running commentary being posted under it every few seconds. Some of the racist comments are shocking and to me, really shows why this is still such big, big news. As a 'bleeding heart liberal', sometimes I forget all do not think the way we do.

Aside from any of that, no more George W Bush. Thank goodness.

I'm struck that we can see the crash of the financial system followed by this inspirational news, all within six weeks or so. Times are a changing and we can - we must - make a contribution in whatever way is possible for us.

Oh, and of course I did cry when it was announced at around 4am. Pretty predictable really!

Is anyone else excited?

I am. I know he's not perfect, but he's the best chance for some change.

Think I may have to stay up and watch the victory. In fact I might even cry when he wins and I'm not African-American, or even American.

What we need is a similar evangelical, principled figure to shake up the British establishment. Perhaps that too will happen as we go into this downturn. I do hope we all become more involved as opposed to more individualistic and/or apathetic. Today, that's what I feel is happening within me. On days where 'THE FEAR' is paralysing me I'm just as self-obsessed as ever. Still, baby steps forward.